The Healing Stage

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Everyone that you lose is not a loss. I need for you to understand that. Your value is worth more than the most precious gold. I also need you to understand that as well. Leaving a man that you love is one of the most difficult but simple things that you can do as a woman. Let me explain.

When you love a person you invest yourself by giving your time, your energy, and your heart to that person. Leaving a person that you have done this for will be difficult because you are expecting something back for your investment. Which

is the reason why the longer you are with a man the harder it will be to leave that man.

Setting up boundaries in the beginning of the relationship will be essential and very important just in case you ever have to Leave him because now he knows your terms and he sees that you care about your heart so if he doesn’t stick to your terms it will be easier for you walk away from him because you set the foundation on the table from the jump. But if you haven’t set any boundaries it will be difficult to leave him immediately, but definitely not impossible.

Love is very powerful, no matter if it’s used for evil or used for good. When a man hurts you by cheating on you he has already committed to leaving you by being untrustworthy in the relationship. When Cheating is involved no excuses are allowed, whether it’s just an action and not a character. Nevertheless the ball is still in your court so if you do want to leave him that’s fully up to you. But to have the strength to leave him you must first love yourself more than you love him. The reason for this is that if you love him more than you love yourself you will naturally neglect your own feelings and needs and emotions and focus solely on his emotions. Instead, even when he cheats on you naturally you would give him a justification of why he did it to you when he use your emotions against you and begins to flip things on you to make you feel guilty for him cheating on you in the first place. And because you love him more than you love yourself you will begin pointing the finger at yourself instead of pointing finger at him. Now let me be very clear, loving a man more than you love yourself isn’t wrong but only after he has earned your trust completely but giving that access to him prematurely in the beginning could be very detrimental to your heart if he find out he is a cheater.

Like I said in the previous chapter before you give your whole heart to a man, you have to first test him. Not one time, two times but however many times you feel it’s needed in order for you to gain the comfort ability of knowing that he will be there for you for the long haul and will not make you look stupid.

In order to leave him you must look in the mirror and focus on your future. Because you matter, you are important and you must gain your strength back of loving yourself. You did wrong by depending on him to care about you so now you must take that position and care about yourself now. And of course he will try to reach out to you through social media, friends, family members, text message, in person, etc. and because of that the first step to leaving a man is to block all access to you whatever you have to do, if that means blocking him, if that means moving, whatever it takes because you love yourself that much more and there’s nothing you wouldn’t do to protect yourself from the person that hurts you. He’s not sorry for what he did, he’s only sorry that he got caught for what he did. A real man who loves you will never cheat on you. Cheating is the worst offense that you can do in a relationship and if he wanted to be with another girl he could’ve just broken up with you and do it the right way because he decided to play with your emotions, feelings, time, and your heart give his bitch ass no mercy, show him no pity when he’s crying on his knees to you, when he’s texting you over and over, when he’s begging for another chance, he wasn’t begging when he was having sex with that woman he wasn’t worried about how you felt so why should you worry about how he feel now. Use that anger that he put in you and transfer it into motivation to gain the confidence you need to back what you lost. Do not, I repeat do not sit in bed thinking about him being depressed you must continue living your life. You must start gaining confidence back in yourself as a woman. Confidence is the key principle for your healing. No woman with low self-esteem will be able to leave. A woman with low self-esteem do not love herself enough and will keep going back to the man that hurts her. The way to fix this is by hitting the gym, focusing on your career, finding a plan to become more independent, go to the movies by yourself, learn ways to make yourself better, do not rush into another relationship, do not give your attention to another man when you’re in the healing stage. Girl you need time to heal yourself. If you are a track star and your leg is broken there’s no way that you can run track no matter how hard you want to you must first wait for your leg to fully heal before you can run track again likewise to a woman that has just ended her relationship give yourself time to heal.

The reason that I wrote this book was for my future daughter and if she is reading this right now I want you to know that daddy loves you more than you could ever imagine. Please listen my words and never forget them. I wrote this for you because I didn’t wanna see you hurt and even if you make a mistake and choose the wrong guy that’s fine. A mistake is only a mistake when you allow it to repeat it. So take heed of the things that are in this book and remember daddy‘s words, you are a queen above queens, royalty is flowing through your veins and no man deserves to be with you if he proceeds on playing games. If he hurts you, he will lose everything. If he loves you, greater things he will gain. Leaving a man that cheated my daughter will be hard with staying will allow the pain to always remain.

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William Dawson

Writer and Reader user